December Update

Sadly, there's not much to update.

I've been seeing my psychiatrist twice a month for the last little while, and now I'm taking Effexor and an anti-anxiety pill.

I am sad every day, and I cry from time-to-time.  Anxiety makes going out a challenge, and I am filled with fear.  Not a great thing when you're trying to prepare for the holiday season.  I try to face my demons, though.

I still feel nothing positive.  NOTHING. POSITIVE.  Just that layer of angst.

I wish I could have my life back.  The one where I was more care-free (I don't think I was ever care-free).  I worry about being unable to regain my status in my career. I dread the thought of my worst fear since childhood being realised... that I would not have a successful career.

Of course, I haven't been able to go workout for the last few weeks... Circumstances and  laziness on my part. I think it's been having an impact on my energy levels and potential for recovery.

Christmas is almost here... and I'd love to feel some holuday spirit.